This has insurance scam written all over it. See more Iceland Ash Jokes. I ordered a burger at McDonald's and the lady behind the counter asked, "Can one afford fries with that?
The only way to keep that money here at home is to buy beer and cigarettes, since these are the only products still produced in the USA. A suited man, an investment banker, is striding along a road in the countryside and he comes across a shepherd and with his flock of sheep. The banker parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects it to his cell phone, and surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where he calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to get an exact fix on his location.
From there he feeds the data to another NASA satellite that scans the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo.
Top Five Banker Jokes To Read When You Don't Have Anything
Within seconds he receives an email on his Smart phone that the image has been processed and the data stored. Finally, he prints out a full-color, page report on his hi-tech, miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the shepherd and says, 'You have exactly sheep'. The shepherd is astonished because the banker's figure is exactly correct. He says, 'OK, I'm a man of my word, take a sheep.
Funny Credit Crunch Jokes
Double or nothing that I can guess your exact occupation. You tried to show me how much smarter than me you are; and you don't know a thing about sheep. Toggle navigation. Spread the humour. Scandal Congress says they are looking into this Bernard Madoff scandal.
Heard the one about the dead banker?
Oh Great!! See more scandals. The credit crunch has helped me get back on my feet. My car's been repossessed. The Allure of Gold On her finger, Sonya, an Economics degree student at Sussex University, England, wore a large gold ring which she was flashing all the time.
Will the prices for it drop? If you like this page then please share it with your friends.
Samurai Bank is trying to soldier on following sharp cuts. Ninja Bank is reported to have taken a hit and almost turned turtle, but they remain in the black and should survive. Furthermore, staff at Karate Bank have got the chop Analysts report that there is something fishy going on at the Sushi Bank where it is feared that staff may get a raw deal. The lady behind the counter puts out a dozen cookies. Wall Street pockets 11 and tells the social worker the damn government employee is trying to steal his cookie. A tragedy is a ship full of bankers going down in a storm; a catastrophe is when they can all swim.
Completely ruined. I went bankrupt. I have no money. I will let you borrow. A young banker decided to get a tailor-made suit.
So he went to the finest tailor in town and got measured for a suit. A week later he went in for his first fitting. He put on the suit and he looked stunning, he felt that in this suit he can do business.
- Die Schönen und Verdammten (detebe) (German Edition).
- All I Ever Wanted (Piano Solo)!
- The Print Machine.
- Du Bist Die Ruh (You Are My Peace)?
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As he was preening himself in front of the mirror he reached down to put his hands in the pockets and to his surprise he noticed that there were no pockets. Why did the post office have to recall a series of stamps depicting famous bankers? People were confused about which side to spit on. Einstein dies and goes to heaven only to be informed that his room is not yet ready. Einstein says that this is no problem at all and that there is no need to make such a great fuss. So the doorman leads him to the dorm.
They enter and Albert is introduced to all of the present inhabitants.
He has an IQ of ! His IQ is ! We can discuss the latest plays at the theater! If a banker and a lawyer were both drowning and you could only save one, would you go to lunch or read the paper? During a bank robbery, the Chief told the Sergeant to cover all exits so that the robbers could not get away.